Atonement
by River of Oblivion
Summary: When Elizabeth helps the team escape imprisonment from an alien civilization intent on making use of Sheppard’s ancient gene, she must pay the price by serving in his place. Sparky UST. Rated T for safety.
1. Penance

_**Atonement**_

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**Disclaimer: I'm almost 100 percent positive that I don't own anything affiliated with Stargate Atlantis...well, at least not in real life. Hey, a girl can dream, right?**_  
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**Summary: When Elizabeth helps the team escape imprisonment from an alien civilization intent on making use of Sheppard's ancient gene, she must pay the price by serving in his place.**

**A/N: I actually got the idea for this fic from a movie entitled "China Cry," where a young woman is forced to work in a communist labor camp in place of her husband after she helps him escape the country. Reviews make me happy!  
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"_Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends" _

_-- John 15:13_

* * *

Elizabeth groaned as her stomach voiced its discomfort for the millionth time that night; she was far from being a big eater, but the amount of food they gave her here wouldn't even be enough to feed a mouse. She had been on M4X-825, otherwise known as Ontarik, for a grand total of four days; for three of those days she'd been a prisoner, held in a cell that was the size of her closet in Atlantis. Initially she'd been in a larger room, back when she'd first been incarcerated along with John and his team; but when everyone else had escaped, her captors had moved her. Never in a million years would Elizabeth have dreamed she'd find herself missing that first cell; but it had looked like a suite at the Ritz compared to the one she occupied now. 

Wrapping the thin scrap of cloth she'd been given as a blanket around her shoulders, Elizabeth wondered, not for the first time, what the Ontarish intended to do with her. Tamesis, the prison guard, had told her she wouldn't like what came next. She had shot back that she wasn't particularly fond of her current situation and the large man had run his tongue over his teeth and smirked at her, telling her that she wouldn't be in this position if her team hadn't tried to escape. He'd ended by saying how her friends had only ended up getting themselves killed and her thrown into a tiny, dank cell. That had been something Tamesis had told her a few times: that John and his team were dead; probably hoping to get some sort of reaction out of her. Each time he was disappointed. Elizabeth wouldn't take the bait; she knew they were all still alive. She was a seasoned diplomat and the prison guard was a terrible liar. She figured the team's escape must have been successful too; otherwise she'd probably still be occupying the larger room and they would be right there beside her. That would certainly account for the livid looks the Ontarish Chancellor, Magus, had shot her when he'd been by to discuss something with Tamesis the other morning. Elizabeth had done her best to ignore the fury in his eyes, but she had a bad feeling that the good Chancellor wasn't one to let bygones be bygones; he wouldn't just let the incident slide. If he hadn't already figured it out, the knowledge of how she'd helped her team execute their escape would send him over the edge.

Elizabeth would be lying if she said she wasn't scared, but that fear had been tempered a great deal by the knowledge that the people she cared about were no longer in the same situation she was.

The Ontarish people's original cause for abducting the team was John's ability to activate Ancient technology. They would have forced him to operate the Ancient weapons platform located in their main city and to use the drones to wipe out what they called "Barbarian villages," scattered throughout the hills that dotted the planet. She, Ronon, Teyla, and Rodney had been collateral; if John refused to cooperate, their captors had made it very clear that they wouldn't hesitate to kill any one of them. All of them had been roughed up a bit, and for some reason she couldn't understand, John had been beaten to within an inch of his life. With Sheppard's head in her lap and a rag spotted with his blood in the other, Elizabeth had made the decision that she would get him out of that place no matter what the cost; and she had ended up paying for his…for the team's freedom with her own.

A harsh clatter snapped Elizabeth out of her thoughts and she bolted upright, all of her senses on the alert.

"Oh, I'm very sorry," It was Umi, the young girl who brought her the scraps of food they called meals around this place.

Elizabeth sighed in relief, "Umi, you scared me half to death."

The girl looked up at her, her big, brown eyes wide with a mixture of apprehension and surprise, "You know my name?"

Elizabeth nodded, "Of course I do."

Umi looked down at her bare, grimy feet, and pushed her dirty blonde hair behind her ears, "It's just, I…none of the other people they keep down here know my name. No one ever does."

Elizabeth's heart went out to the little girl, but before she had a chance to reply, Tamesis burst through the door. His eyes found hers and his mouth curved into something between a smirk and a snarl.

"Good to see you up and about Dr. Weir, I was afraid I was going to have to wake you."

Elizabeth resisted the urge to roll her eyes, "Well thank you so much for your concern."

Tamesis turned to Umi, "You, girl…go feed the other prisoners; Dr. Weir here doesn't need any breakfast today."

Elizabeth's mouth fell open, "Excuse me? Why not?"

The burly prison guard laughed, showing a broken set of yellowed teeth, "Magus' orders; besides, if you're feeling feisty enough to make a smart comment like that we must be feeding you too much."

Elizabeth silently cursed the propensity she had for picking up John's habits. This particular practice of making sarcastic comments at inopportune times was really starting to get her into trouble.

When Tamesis moved to open the door to her cell she frowned in confusion. "The Chancellor would like to meet with you." The guard smirked, noticing her bewilderment.

"Oh, well the pleasure's all mine," Drat, there was that overt sarcasm again. Elizabeth bit the inside of her cheek; she was really going to have to work on her self-control.

_**SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGA**_

"Dr. Weir," Magus' aged face was devoid of emotion.

"Chancellor," Elizabeth drew herself up to her full height and clasped her hands in front of her, pretending she wasn't bruised, filthy and starving, "What can I do for you?"

"Since you are the only member of your team still with us, you will have to serve in Colonel Sheppard's place."

Elizabeth crossed her arms, "Unfortunately for you, I don't have the ancient gene; and even if I did, I wouldn't use it to destroy thousands of innocent people."

Magus didn't even bat an eyelash, "I am aware that you do not possess the gene Doctor; you will be assisting our workers in the fields. In this way you will be doing the Ontarish people a great service…since Sheppard is no longer here to aid us in the way we had wished."

"How long do you plan on keeping me here?" Elizabeth narrowed her eyes.

Magus' demeanor changed in an instant, his eyes hardening and his voice lowering to a growl, "Until you take your last breath."

He exchanged a glance with Tamesis, "Take her to the Northwest sector and put her to work."

Elizabeth started to protest but the guard roughly grabbed her arm and hauled her out of the room.

She gave him an icy glare, "My people will come for me; you won't get away with this."

Tamesis barked out a cruel laugh, "We'll see."

_SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGA_

It turned out that the "fields" Magus had mentioned were in fact vast expanses of jagged rock that the Ontarish were carrying out to use in assembling new buildings. It was the workers' job to cut the stone and haul it to the carts, which were then pulled by oxen to the outskirts of the main city.

By the end of the day, Elizabeth's hands were raw and torn, her knees bruised, and her Atlantis uniform was covered in a thick grey dust. She was exhausted, dehydrated, and weak with hunger. Tamesis personally escorted her back to her cell, tugging on her arm whenever she started to slow. Upon reaching her cell, she saw a bowl of water and a piece of bread sitting just inside the doorway.

Hearing her stomach growl in response, Tamesis chuckled as he moved to open the door, "Feeling a little hungry are we Dr. Weir?"

Tossing Elizabeth roughly onto her pallet, Tamesis made a point of stepping squarely on her dinner before locking her up for the night. She directed a withering glare at the guard's back, but didn't protest; she didn't want to waste what precious little energy she had left on what would prove to be a fruitless fight.

Delicately picking around the mashed portions of her evening meal, Elizabeth sighed wearily and winced as the movement of her fingers tugged at the broken skin of her palms, reopening her partially healed wounds. She quickly downed the water and settled up against the bars of her cell, resting her forehead against the cool metal. Her heartbeat was slow and even, a welcome change from the harsh pounding that had pulsed through her veins and filled her ears while she was doing work that a man twice her size would be hard-pressed to accomplish. She suspected her witty comebacks had earned her one of the more difficult assignments and she once again cursed John Sheppard's influence on her mannerisms. Elizabeth closed her eyes, a strange sense of peace washing over her. No matter what happened to her, at least he was no longer in this awful place…at least her family was safe; and that made it all worthwhile.

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	2. Coping

_**Atonement**_

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At least they were safe; that was Rodney's one condolence in all of this. At least, that was what he was prepared to tell Sheppard when the unconscious Colonel decided to rejoin the land of the living. Though he had a powerful sense of self preservation, Rodney hated the idea of leaving someone behind, especially Atlantis' leader and one of his closest friends, simply so he could save his own skin. But she hadn't asked his permission, she'd ordered them to leave her behind; and even though Teyla was technically in charge with John incapacitated, the Athosian had acquiesced with Elizabeth's command. It seemed the multilingual diplomat had a sacrificial lamb complex that rivaled her military commander's. Rodney knew, however, that her plan was really the only viable one; Sheppard needed immediate medical attention and they had run out of options. That hadn't made it easier though, and Rodney knew that everyone felt the loss of Dr. Weir's presence keenly.

Teyla was trying to coordinate a rescue effort, but the fact that the Ontarish had unusually high security for being such a technology stinted society made the planning process difficult. She had contacted Earth and let them know the situation, but the Daedalus was busy helping in the fight against the Ori and Caldwell wouldn't be able to make it to the Pegasus Galaxy anytime in the near future. Ronon was trying to help the Athosian leader shoulder the load, but he was even more irritable than usual and his gruff comments and perpetual scowl had everyone walking on eggshells around him.

As for Rodney, he had thrown himself into his work, snapping at the other scientists and constantly arguing with Zelenka, who had become more withdrawn and morose in the past couple of days. Rodney honestly felt badly about the way he was treating everyone, but it was better than actually examining the reason he was behaving that way.

To top it all off, the whole situation was only going to get uglier once Sheppard regained consciousness; because as badly as the rest of them were handling Elizabeth being gone, John's reaction would be ten times worse.

"Kilburne, these equations still don't add up and I don't have the time to fix your mistakes, so either figure them out on your own or ask Zelenka to help you; either way, I don't want to see your face until your formulas are correct," Rodney pushed the handheld back at the physicist, who quickly sulked off, looking for all the world like a kicked puppy.

Ignoring the looks the other scientists were giving him, Rodney rubbed his face tiredly and turned back to the simulation he'd been running, only to bump smack into Teyla.

"Oh sorry, I didn't see you there. I was just going to…Um…was there something you needed?" Rodney stammered in lieu of a greeting.

"You should not take out your frustration over this situation on your colleagues," Teyla raised a disapproving eyebrow.

"Ah yes, well the thing is…"

"Colonel Sheppard is awake," she smoothly interrupted his excuse, getting to the purpose of her visit.

"Oh, ah, well that's good." In reality Rodney felt the swirling of two conflicting emotions, mostly relief, but there was a strong undercurrent of distress.

How were they going to explain to Sheppard that they had left Elizabeth behind?

_SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGA_

"We did what?!" Sheppard's exclamation quickly dissolved into a coughing fit.

"Easy Colonel," Dr. Keller placed a hand on his arm and shot his visitors a warning glance.

Teyla moved closer to his bedside, looking more distressed than Rodney had ever seen her, "I am very sorry Colonel, but Dr. Weir gave us implicit instructions…"

"That wasn't her call to make!" Their battered team leader's eyes were wide with shock and disbelief.

Rodney decided to intervene, "Look, you were hurt and we had to get you out of there. If Elizabeth hadn't helped us, none of us would be here right now."

"If there had been any other way…" Teyla's voice had softened considerably as she tried to reassure her friend.

Sheppard leaned his head back against the pillows and closed his eyes, "Okay, so what are we doing to get her back?"

Ronon and Teyla exchanged a hesitant glance. "We've hit a few snags trying to work out a rescue plan," the tall Satedan unfolded his arms, watching the other man for his reaction to the news.

John pushed himself up and started to swing his legs over the edge of the bed.

Dr. Keller was on him in an instant, "And just where do you think you're going?"

"I'm going to get Elizabeth back," his tone was challenging, his eyes icy.

Keller wasn't fazed in the slightest, "Just what exactly made you think you had my permission to leave the infirmary?"

"Someone has to do something!"

"Colonel, we are doing the best we can," Teyla hurried to reassure him, "Everyone has been working day and night…"

Sheppard suddenly stopped in his escape attempt and froze, fixing his wide eyes on the Athosian, "Night and day?! How long have I been out?"

Rodney grimaced, "Three days."

John's breath escaped with an audible whoosh, "Three days?" He looked like he'd just discovered Bigfoot was real.

Silence, filled with tension and weighted by things unsaid, settled into every nook and cranny of the infirmary. Long moments passed before Sheppard finally shattered the unbearable quiet, "How did we escape?"

It was Ronon who eventually answered, "Dr. Weir was told that she would be taken to see the Chancellor, so she told us to be ready to go, that she would create a diversion."

"What kind of a diversion?"

"We are not entirely sure," Teyla gracefully shrugged her shoulders, "One moment all was calm, and the next, all the guards exited the room and Ronon was able to lodge a knife in the cell's control panel, enabling us to escape."

John gave Ronon a halfhearted smile, "One to keep and one for them to find, eh?"

The Satedan regarded him somberly, "Something like that."

Another long silence threatened to fall, but Dr. Keller quickly intervened, "All right everyone, the Colonel needs his rest."

John exhaled sharply and turned his face toward the wall.

Teyla and Ronon exchanged another look, then walked out of the infirmary side by side.

Rodney started to follow them, but paused before he reached the doorway, "We will get her back Sheppard; no matter what it takes. You have to believe that."

John didn't acknowledge his friend's statement, didn't even flicker his eyes in his direction. Rodney waited a few moments for a response, then sighed and turned to leave.

"Thanks McKay," the Colonel's voice came out barely above a whisper.

Rodney swallowed hard, "No problem."

He hoped against hope that Elizabeth would be returned to them safe and whole, for all their sakes.

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	3. Dance with the Devil

_**A/N: Well, that took forever to update. Still, better late than never!**_

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The planet's twin suns beat mercilessly down upon her, and Elizabeth was reminded of the time she helped settle a political dispute in Mozambique. At the time she'd thought it would be impossible for her to ever find someplace where it was hotter; it wasn't the first time she'd been wrong and it certainly wouldn't be the last.

Groaning audibly as she lifted a particularly heavy rock onto the back of the cart, Elizabeth found herself desperately wishing for a couple of Tylenol…or maybe some morphine…_oh yeah, and some water would be nice_.

As if her weary, parched mind had summoned him, Tamesis suddenly appeared in the distance, driving a cart loaded with water jugs toward the thirsty workers.

Elizabeth gratefully reached for a jug but her hand was quickly slapped away by Tamesis.

"Get in the cart," he commanded, his voice clipped. "Magus wishes to speak to you," he added, answering the question in her posture.

Elizabeth nodded once and started to climb in next to the guard; but Tamesis snorted, thumbing toward the back. A sneer creased his ugly face, "Prison scum have to ride with the load."

Elizabeth bit the inside of her cheek to hold back a sharp retort and did as she was told. She sighed in relief as the weight was taken off her aching feet, and she saw several of the other workers eye her jealously.

Tamesis lashed the oxen across the back with his whip and they were off. The ride back to the Council House was uneventful and far too short for Elizabeth's liking. Her sore muscles protested when she jumped down from the back of the cart, causing her to hiss in pain. The prison guard was less than sympathetic; he grabbed her arm, his fingers landing in their accustomed place, and almost yanked it out of the socket with the speed and power with which he pulled her after him. They entered the House through one of its numerous side doors, and when her eyes adjusted to the relative darkness in the small room, the first thing Elizabeth saw was a MALP situated in the middle of the floor, Magus hovering behind it.

"Tell us about this device," the aged Chancellor tried to sound confident and domineering, but Elizabeth could hear the underlying uncertainty in his voice. _They're afraid,_ she realized as she observed the men's body language, _afraid of the MALP._ Had the situation been less hazardous she would have laughed; as it was, Tamesis' and the Chancellor's ignorance over the machine's purpose could work in her favor. Letting them believe it was a weapon gave her the upper hand.

The MALP suddenly emitted a burst of static, followed by a garbled message, "This…Rod…Kay…lantis…like to…peak…ith…agus."

"Ah, so this is a transmitting device?" Magus looked intrigued and relieved, "How do I answer?"

Elizabeth sighed, so much for that advantage. She motioned toward a series of switches, the largest of which opened up two-way communication. The camera lens dilated, widening Atlantis' view of the room.

"…izabeth?" Rodney sounded surprised

Under Tamesis' watchful eye she leaned in and flipped the switch, "Hi Rodney."

"You look awful!" Apparently the radio transmission had stabilized.

Elizabeth rolled her eyes, "Thanks Rodney, I appreciate it."

Dr. Weir?" Teyla's concerned voice floated over the airway, "Are you all right?"

Elizabeth grimaced; she must have looked worse than she thought. "I'm fine Teyla; how's John?"

"He will be fine, though he is very anxious to leave the infirmary."

_Yeah, I'll bet, _Elizabeth thought wryly.

Tamesis growled, obviously tired of the exchange of pleasantries, and cuffed her in the side of the head, "This is a waste of time!"

Magus nodded calmly, "I agree." He turned and addressed the MALP, "Why have you contacted us?"

Teyla's voice came back strong and even, "We would like to negotiate for Dr. Weir's release."

The Ontarish leader laughed incredulously, "You cannot be serious."

"We have food, medical supplies…"

Magus waved a hand, cutting her off, "I don't care what you have; there will be no trade. This is no longer a matter of efficiency or necessity; you people have vexed me greatly, and Dr. Weir will pay for your behavior," he paused briefly, "Oh, and don't attempt a rescue; if you so much as step foot on this planet your beloved leader will die." He nodded to Tamesis, who removed his gun from its holster and fired five energy blasts into the MALP at point-blank range, leaving the control panel smoking and rendering it useless.

_SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGA_

"That went well," Ronon commented dryly.

"It appears that our escape has greatly angered the Ontarish," Teyla stared at the blank screen.

"Well that is a shock," Rodney adopted an expression of mock astonishment, "Because I gotta tell you, I figured they'd be thrilled that we refused to help them, had Elizabeth create a distraction so we could escape, and then killed the two guards who were guarding the 'Gate. Was that just me?"

"McKay…" Ronon's tone was a warning.

"We need to come up with a plan, not fight and complain," Zelenka piped up from the corner, suddenly becoming the unexpected voice of reason.

"Come up with a plan? That's ingenious! Why didn't I think of that?" McKay shot back sarcastically.

Teyla sighed and turned away from the console, "Dr. Zelenka is correct Rodney; we will not be able to accomplish anything if we continue to argue with each other."

"Of course, it's not like we were accomplishing anything before either," Ronon pointed out, earning himself a stern glare from the Athosian.

Zelenka pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose, "So what have we tried so far?"

"Lorne proposed a standard covert rescue mission; he said that none of his men would hesitate to go in after Elizabeth. Unfortunately, the Ontarish have a pretty impressive array of defenses, including a couple of gun turrets as well as a ridiculously large number of soldiers, most of whom are probably guarding the Stargate and keeping an eye on Elizabeth," Rodney explained, his face solemn.

Zelenka shook his head in confusion, "I do not understand; if the defenses were as good as you say, how did you manage to escape?"

The three teammates exchanged glances, and it was Ronon who answered, "I don't know what Dr. Weir did to draw the guards away, but whatever it was, it was big; no one was manning the turrets and we hardly saw any soldiers on our way to the 'Gate."

The Czech's eyes went wide for a brief moment before he recovered, "Okay, so are these turrets powerful enough to take down a Puddlejumper?"

McKay nodded emphatically, "Oh yeah."

"Could we not use the cloak?" Teyla inquired, her eyes flicking between the two scientists.

Rodney looked thoughtful, "We could, but there's always the chance that the Ontarish will connect the Stargate activating to us; after all, they don't exactly get a lot of visitors. And I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm not willing to risk Elizabeth's life."

Teyla frowned, "You believe that Magus will carry out his threat?"

Rodney gave her a look, "Don't you? The man is clearly unstable…"

"Could we gate to a planet nearby and then fly over?" Ronon quickly cut off McKay's rant.

Teyla's eyes lit up at the idea, making Ronon feel like he'd just won some sort of prize. His self-congratulations were soon cut short, however, by Zelenka shaking his head.

"Unfortunately the nearest planet is too far away for a Jumper to travel between the stargates," the Czech scientist explained apologetically.

Rodney suddenly started snapping his fingers, "Unless…" he trailed off, his excitement palpable.

"Unless 'what,' McKay?" Ronon ground out.

The astrophysicist whirled on Zelenka, "Radek, I'm going to need your help."

Zelenka looked completely stunned, whether that was because Rodney had come up with a plan so quickly, or because the arrogant scientist had actually admitted he'd need help, Ronon couldn't be sure. He did know one thing though, and that was that he hated not knowing what was going on.

"McKay!" he made his voice as deep and intimidating as possible, but the scientists were already exiting the room, jabbering back and forth in what Sheppard liked to call 'geek speak.'

He was about to storm after then when Teyla laid a hand on his forearm, "Ronon, just wait; they will tell us what they have come up with soon enough."

He couldn't exactly argue with that; then again he could count on one hand the number of times he'd argued with her, probably because he had a hard time disagreeing with anything Teyla said, especially when she leveled those big brown eyes at him, and even more so when he knew she was right.

Still, McKay had better hurry it up, or Ronon was going to have to pay him a visit down at the lab.


	4. Fly Me To the Moon

**A/N: Hooray! I finally updated! Sorry for taking so long, but I lost my muse there for a while. Hopefully this extra long chapter will mollify anyone who was actually waiting to read more of the story.**

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Elizabeth stared at the charred remains of the MALP's control panel with a mixture of shock and disbelief. The earlier narrative had left her confused and a little frightened. To be honest, the Ontarish' actions made no sense to her; the fact that Magus wouldn't trade her for supplies that would better his people's lives was puzzling at best. When the reality hit that she was only there so the Chancellor could carry out some twisted version of revenge, she'd almost lost her nerve. They didn't really care about keeping her alive; they cared about pushing her to the limit and then disposing of her when she was no longer of any use to them. In fact, they might grow tired of her sooner than that and kill her anyway. The game had suddenly become much more dangerous. 

Magus waved a hand in her general direction, "Take her back to her cell, but don't give her any food; she didn't work hard enough to deserve something to eat today."

Elizabeth's jaw dropped and Tamesis chuckled, "You'd best close your mouth before someone does it for you."

She glared at him as he grabbed her wrist and hauled her along behind him. She was really starting to get sick of being manhandled; and she really hated being treated like a common criminal and second-hand slave. But Magus' words made her nervous, and she knew she was going to have to call on all of her diplomatic training if she wanted a chance at surviving this. She entered her cell quietly, ignoring the prison guard when he tried to goad her into saying something rash. When Tamesis tired of harassing her, he stomped back the way they'd come, shoving Umi to the ground as the young girl entered the room.

Elizabeth gritted her teeth angrily, "Are you all right?" Her dry throat made her voice sound especially harsh as it echoed off the stone walls.

Umi started as though she hadn't realized Elizabeth was there. She quickly recovered, picking herself up and bowing politely, "I am fine," then she frowned, "Aren't you usually in the fields at this time?"

Elizabeth smiled wryly, "I got in trouble because my people tried to negotiate for my release."

Umi's blue eyes filled with confusion. "Nego-shee-ay-te," she tried out the strange sounding word.

"It means they tried to talk Magus into letting me go," Elizabeth smiled for real.

Comprehension dawned on the little girl's face and she suddenly turned very serious. "That wouldn't work; the Chancellor doesn't let people go," she sounded very sure of herself.

Elizabeth grimaced slightly, "So it would seem; Magus doesn't seem like a very forgiving man."

Umi nodded sagely, "The ones who captured me and brought me to this world owed the Chancellor money, so he killed them and made me work here. He told me I would have to work to pay off their debt."

Elizabeth could certainly relate to that. "How long have you been here?"

The girl scrunched up her forehead, "Almost three years."

Elizabeth's eyes widened, "How old are you?"

Umi shyly held up eight fingers.

It was Elizabeth's turn to be surprised; she would have wagered a guess that the young blond was closer to her pre-teen years. Umi seemed very mature for her age, but she supposed growing up as a prison slave would be enough to destroy anyone's carefree innocence.

"Did they capture you too?" Umi's quiet question shook Elizabeth out of her thoughts.

"Yes, but they didn't take me from another planet. My people and I came to this world."

Umi's nose wrinkled in disgust, "You came here? Why would anyone want to come to Ontarik?"

Elizabeth had to laugh, "We're explorers. We came through the stargate looking for people with whom we could become trading partners."

The little girl looked perplexed, "The stargate?"

"You may know it as the Astria Porta," Elizabeth explained.

Umi nodded, "Ah yes, the travel ring," then she frowned, "But you said 'we;' what happened to the others who were with you?"

Elizabeth exhaled, relief once again flooding through her soul, "They're safe. We were being held in a different area, one with larger cells. They wanted to use my friend to kill the people who live in the hills around here," she paused, a pained expression on her face, "They beat him, and the rest of us to some extent. My friend needed medical help so I created a distraction that would allow my team to escape."

Umi's eyes had grown wider with every word, "What did you do?"

Elizabeth looked at her hands, "I uh…I set one of the store houses on fire."

The little girl stared in disbelief, "How did you do that?"

"Well, I noticed the first time we were taken to see Magus that we passed a long row of what looked like little houses; and when I glanced inside one, I could see bags and bags of flour," Elizabeth gave a little shrug, "The next time Magus wanted to see me I pretended to trip in front of that building and 'accidentally' knocked the guard over. All members of my team carry these," she paused and pulled out a tiny box of matches from her worn jacket pocket, "We use them to start fires." At Umi's nod of understanding she continued, "While the guard was recovering I quickly lit a match and then stuck it back in its box so it would light all the others; then I threw it into the store house. I took my friend's box just in case it didn't work the first time…but as it turned out, I didn't need to worry."

Elizabeth took a deep breath and a ghost of a smile graced her lips, "We were almost to the Council House when the whole thing went up in flames behind us."

Umi cocked her head, "But how did your friends escape?"

Elizabeth chuckled, "Let's just say they're very resourceful."

The girl just stared at her for a few long seconds before breaking her silence, "You must care for these people a whole lot to have made such a sacrifice."

Umi's words struck a chord and Elizabeth felt a sharp pang resonate in her heart.

She got a distant look in her eyes, "Yes, they mean a great deal to me."

"Hey girl!" Tamesis loud voice came from down the hall, interrupting their little heart-to-heart.

Umi visibly jumped and turned in the direction of the prison guard's shouting. She glanced back at Elizabeth and made a face, "I'm sorry, but I must go before he catches me not doing my work." She quickly brushed herself off, then gave Elizabeth one last reassuring smile, "I am sure you will see your friends again."

Elizabeth watched her go, wishing she had as much confidence and optimism as her new acquaintance.

_SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGA_

"All right, I have a plan!" McKay's enthusiastic proclamation jolted Teyla awake, sending the book she'd fallen asleep on crashing to the floor.

"What do you mean _you _have a plan?" Radek countered, raising an eyebrow.

"Well yes, I suppose Zelenka helped a little," Rodney amended with an eye roll.

Teyla blinked rapidly in an attempt to clear the gritty feeling from her eyes as McKay plopped his handheld computer down in front of her.

"As you know, M4X-825 is one of three moons circling a giant gas planet," the astrophysicist drew a simple diagram using his stylus, "And as you also know, neither the planet nor any of the other moons have stargates; if they did we wouldn't be having this problem. Now the closest planet with a stargate is out here," he paused and drew a circle in the upper left corner, "and as we already mentioned, it's too far away for a direct flight in a Puddlejumper. However, we might, and I stress the might, be able to modify the Jumper's controls enough to get us to one of Ontarik's sister moons."

Teyla frowned, "But how will that help us get to Ontarik itself?"

Rodney grinned excitedly, "We're going to attempt to build up enough velocity on our way over that we'll be able slingshot around this moon," he sketched a line going from the far planet to one of the smaller circles orbiting the gas giant in the bottom left corner and circled around it once before drawing an arrow toward M4X-825.

Zelenka beamed, "It is much like what they did in 'Apollo 13.'"

The Czech's comment was met with a blank stare from the Athosian woman.

Rodney shook his head, "Radek, you're an idiot."

Zelenka spread his hands out, "What? Isn't it?"

Teyla ignored the two scientists and concentrated on the diagram in front of her, "All right, so this will get us to Ontarik; but what do we do once we get there?"

McKay held up a finger, "Ah yes; that will be the tricky part. In order to rescue Elizabeth we'd either have to attempt to quietly infiltrate the city and wander around trying to find her or we could go with a more direct approach…which would require us to have the ability to neutralize the hundreds of soldiers who will be trying to make sure Elizabeth stays where she is."

Teyla only had to think for a fraction of a second before the answer popped into her head, "The chair."

Rodney snapped his fingers, "Exactly."

Her lips stretching into a smile, Teyla released a deep breath, "And who were you thinking would operate it?"

Zelenka cleared his throat, "Well, with the only two people who've ever used a control chair injured and…gone, we were thinking that perhaps Major Lorne would be a good candidate."

The Athosian leader nodded once, "Very well; I believe we should head to the infirmary and inform Ronon and Colonel Sheppard of our decision."

"I bet this bit of information will put the Colonel in a good mood," Radek commented, looking a bit relieved himself.

………………………………………………………………………….

"What do you mean, 'no'," John's eyes glittered dangerously.

"You're far from being fully recovered," Dr. Keller reminded her patient sternly, "And there is absolutely no way I am going to clear you to go off-world while you're in this condition."

Sheppard was far from finished, "Look, I'm the most qualified person to go on this mission. I'm the only person still living who's used the chair before."

"Colonel, we believe Major Lorne would be adequately able to handle the controls," Teyla stepped in gracefully.

John shook his head, "But I'm still the obvious choice. I can handle this."

Rodney shifted uncomfortably, "Sheppard, I don't think…"

"Don't you get it?!" John ran a hand through his already messy hair, a mixture of anxiety, guilt and fear reflecting in his eyes, "It's my fault."

Teyla winced as his words echoed the same self-recrimination that had been plaguing her thoughts the past few days. Ronon must have noticed because he lightly brushed her fingers with his and said, "It's no one's fault but the Ontarish's."

John lowered his gaze, "My head knows that, but my heart? It won't accept that I'm not responsible for what happened."

Teyla could certainly relate to the military leader's feelings.

"If it wasn't for my ancient gene we wouldn't have even been in that predicament, "John continued, his voice soft and sad, "I was supposed to protect her…but I failed."

"Sheppard, this was Elizabeth's choice," Rodney emphasized, "She chose to stay behind. She wouldn't blame you; and none of us blame you either."

"I can't just stay behind and do nothing," John somehow managed to sound authoritative and pleading at the same time.

"Colonel Sheppard, I know how you feel…" Dr. Keller started, "Really I do, but…"

"With all due respect Doctor, I don't think you have the slightest idea how I feel," John shot back sharply.

Keller's eyes flashed in anger, "How dare you presume to know all about my life. You don't know anything!"

"I know you don't know how I feel. You know why? Because if you understood you'd let me go on this mission," John answered calmly.

The petite doctor visibly deflated, then hesitantly chewed her bottom lip. After a few moments she sighed, "Fine, you can go; but you're going to stay in the Jumper, understood?"

Rodney was quick on the uptake, "What, are you crazy?"

"Rodney!" Teyla's normally smooth voice had acquired a bit of an edge. She turned to the young doctor, "I shall do my best to make sure Colonel Sheppard acquiesces with your demands, Dr. Keller."

The other woman nodded, an indefinable emotion flashing across her features, "I hope you get her back; and I'll have a medical team awaiting your call. Now if you'll excuse me, I have other patients to attend to."

Teyla turned her attention to Atlantis' resident genius, "Rodney, how long will it take to make the necessary modifications to the Puddlejumper?"

McKay shook his head, "That will unfortunately take a bit of time. If everything goes according to plan, I'm thinking twenty-four hours minimum."

Sheppard, used to the scientist's blindingly fast ability to tweak technology, was more than a little surprised, "What kind of modifications are you planning to do?"

Rodney huffed in annoyance, "Remember the part where I'm not Superman?"

"All right, here is what we are going to do," Teyla easily took control of the situation, "Rodney? You and Dr. Zelenka should start working immediately; and Ronon? I would appreciate it if you would fill Major Lorne in on the details of the mission. I will start packing any supplies we might need. Is that all right with everyone?"

McKay didn't answer but left the infirmary in a hurry, already muttering calculations to himself.

Ronon grinned at her and briefly inclined his head in acknowledgement before he too left to fulfill his duties.

John waited for them to leave before speaking, "Thank you Teyla." His gratitude was heartfelt.

She smiled and shrugged, "I too know how you feel, Colonel Sheppard. In an instance much like this, when someone close to me was lost, you helped bring them back; and I know you would do so again. I thought I would return the favor."

His eyes shot up to meet hers, and Teyla knew he was surprised that she had chosen to disclose something so personal…and that he was trying to decipher what, exactly, she was implying.

She raised her eyebrows, daring him to contradict her, but Sheppard just gave a slight nod and slowly pushed himself out of the infirmary bed.

His eyes regained their usual fire and Teyla saw the same man that had made her choose to leave behind everything she knew to follow him years before.

John's voice deepened with a steely resolve, "Let's bring her back."


	5. Consequences

**A/N: Yay! An update from yours truly. Hopefully the next one will be up sooner. Thanks for reading! **

* * *

Struggling unsuccessfully to lift a rock four times the size of her head, Elizabeth scanned the immediate area for someone who might be able to help her, but the other workers were studiously ignoring her.

Come to think of it, her fellow prisoners had been acting strangely toward her all morning. She'd caught them sending her furtive glances, and whispering hurriedly to each other when the guards weren't looking. She had tried her best to ignore what was going on around her; but now, when she needed help, her peers' bizarre behavior was starting to get on her nerves.

Blowing her hair out of her eyes with a huff of frustration, Elizabeth gathered herself and tugged on the rock with everything she had; but it was to no avail.

One of the guards was watching her and fingering his whip in anticipation, and while she hadn't been at the receiving end of one of the long leather chords, she had seen enough to know that the guards were quite fond of lashing them across the workers' backs at the first sign of "laziness."

Her heart rate quickening with anxiety, Elizabeth turned to head to a different area, hoping against hope that the guard with the twitchy trigger finger didn't deem her important enough to bother with.

Probably without knowing it, a nearby worker saved her as he suddenly collapsed in an exhausted heap. The watchful sentry was on the hapless prisoner in a second, and Elizabeth shivered to think that could have been her. Just as soon as that thought passed, she felt slightly nauseous knowing that she was **thankful** for another human being's pain and suffering. John would have told her not to be so hard on herself, that she was in an extreme situation and the emotions she was feeling were only natural; but she was still shocked by how quickly she'd changed…and the kind of person desperation had made her become.

She was still pondering her unfortunate reality when her foot caught on something and she was sent tumbling to the ground. Potential embarrassment turned to concern as Elizabeth realized it hadn't been a rock that she'd tripped over; it had been a strategically placed human foot.

Spitting the dirt out of her mouth, she turned her face and met a pair of cold grey eyes.

"A little birdie told us you was the one what blowed up our food supply," the older man motioned behind him with a nod of his slightly grizzled head; and Elizabeth noticed with a bit of trepidation that there was a sizeable group of prisoners gathered behind him, all of them eyeing her bitterly.

Thinking it wiser to stay on the ground, Elizabeth opted to remain where she was.

She did feel sorry for them, whether the information they'd received was true or not. They obviously believed it, and she could understand their anger. She felt guilty at the thought that she might have caused these people, most of whom had probably not done anything to deserve their imprisonment, any undue suffering; but she still felt the need to defend her actions. "I'm sorry; I did what I had to do to help my friends escape. One of them was severely injured."

The ringleader narrowed his eyes, "You think I'm goin' ta feel sorry for you? I don't care none about you or your friends. All I care about is the fact me rations been cut in half."

Elizabeth saw the other prisoners nodding in agreement. She wondered briefly why the guards weren't getting involved; and it took her half the space of a heartbeat to realize the guards were most likely the ones who had set the whole thing up. The prisoners could vent their frustration and Tamesis could teach his most troublesome inmate a lesson at the same time.

It was still a shock though, when the first blow landed square between her shoulder blades. Next, a vicious kick to her stomach drove all the air from her lungs. The next foot that came flying toward her she was able to grab and twist, sending her attacker onto the ground. It was then that her assailants grew really angry. She fought back the best she could using a combination of the few self-defense moves Teyla had taught her and her body's natural reflexes; but there were too many of them, and she was already exhausted from her harsh treatment over the past few days.

The assault was brief but furious, and by the time the guards did move to break up the fight, Elizabeth was left motionless amongst the rocks, gasping in pain. One of the guards tentatively prodded her side with his boot, then picked her up and tossed her none too gently into the back of the water cart, where she was able to assess the extent of her injuries.

Her left shoulder was dislocated, that she knew for sure; her arm hung limp and useless at her side, and fire shot all the way down to her fingers when she tried to move it. Her chest was tight and when she inhaled too deeply she could feel sharp, stabbing pain blossoming in her ribcage, leading her to believe that one or more of her ribs were broken. Elizabeth knew she had cuts and bruises everywhere, and she could only hope that none of them went too deep.

She started to cough as the cart jerked forward, a dry, racking cough that only served to exacerbate the pain in her chest. She tried to stop her lungs' convulsions, but there was nothing she could do. The coughing spell lasted a few minutes, after which she emptied the meager contents of her stomach onto the rocking cart.

This time, the ride back to the city was agonizingly long. The trail couldn't be called smooth by any stretch of the imagination, and Elizabeth could acutely feel each and every tiny bump along the way. When the oxen finally lurched to a stop, she waited fearfully for what might happen next.

It turned out Tamesis was there to greet her, "Well, well, Dr. Weir; gotten ourselves into a bit of trouble, have we?"

Her one wish at that moment was that she was strong enough to wipe that smug smirk off his ugly face…or that Ronon was there to do it for her. As it was she could only glare, and even then only partially; someone had landed a punch right below her right eye and it was now almost swollen shut.

Tamesis' smile never left his face as he instructed the other guard to take her back to her cell. This particular guard must have gained a little pity toward her during their trip because he was more careful about picking her up this time; and after he laid her carefully on her blanket he took the time to fetch her a bowl of water.

Elizabeth waited for the man to leave before letting herself collapse. She allowed a few weary tears to fall before siphoning off those emotions which would make her appear weak. In a place like this, only the strong survived; and while she actually felt incredibly helpless, she wasn't about to divulge that bit of information to her captors. She had a variety of masks in her facial expression repertoire; and she'd had to make use of the strong, fearless leader facade quite a few times during her stay in Atlantis, so she'd become adept at utilizing it. It was a skill that had served her well during the past days; but she knew the longer she stayed on this wretched planet, the harder it was going to be to keep that mask firmly in place…especially now, when the pain coursing through her body made her want to cry and scream herself hoarse.

Elizabeth's one comfort was that she had been able to spare her teammates from a similar fate. She knew her people would do everything in their power to try to get her back, even with Magus' threat hanging over their heads, and she silently thanked all of them for their efforts; but no matter the outcome, whether they succeeded or failed, Elizabeth didn't and wouldn't regret her decision to stay behind. For her, it was all worth it.

That affirmation was her last coherent thought before the soothing darkness claimed her.


	6. Threadbare

**A/N: I really have no excuse for not updating this sooner except that I'm trying to get over a bad case of writer's block. You know how it is...  
**

* * *

"Yowch!" Rodney jerked his hand away from the crystal grid and sucked on his stinging fingers, "Zelenka! I told you to wait for my signal to start transferring power!"

"Rodney, I don't have the slightest idea what you are speaking about," Radek's frustrated voice came from outside the Jumper, "I haven't touched anything."

McKay blinked in surprise, then grabbed his laptop and squinted at the screen. "Oh, well that is just perfect isn't it," he angrily pushed a few buttons, "Why does nothing ever go the way I plan it?"

"Is something wrong?" Zelenka appeared in the hatch, his forehead scrunched in concern.

Rodney rolled his eyes, "Of course not Radek; I'm only pretending to be upset! In reality everything's peachy!"

Zelenka threw his hands up in the air, "Why must you always be such a _necitlivý __krétský_?"

"Excuse me, what?" Rodney glared at the Czech scientist, his anger and frustration at the whole situation threatening to boil over.

"You are not the only one who gets stressed out or worried or put under pressure Rodney," Zelenka emphasized the 'you' and narrowed his eyes.

McKay snorted, "Oh please…"

"And you are not the only one who misses her," Zelenka interrupted, finishing his original thought.

Rodney's mouth popped open in preparation for a retort, but at his colleague's words it snapped shut again. He smiled ruefully at Radek, "That may be true, but I am the one who's going to have to tell Sheppard that it's going to take us longer than originally planned to modify these Jumper."

Zelenka winced, "Perhaps we could just tell Teyla, and she could pass on the news."

"Tell me what?" The topic of their conversation had suddenly appeared right behind them.

McKay let out a rather girlish shriek and clapped his hands over his heart, "Oh…I think I'm having palpitations," he glared at the petite Athosian, "Don't sneak up on me like that!"

Teyla cocked her head, "I approached you the same way I always do."

"Exactly," Rodney mumbled irritably.

She ignored him and calmly clasped her hands in front of her, "What is it you wished to tell me?"

Rodney and Zelenka exchanged a sheepish glance. "We have run into a bit of a snag regarding our Jumper modifications," Radek explained.

The pretty Athosian delicately pinched the bridge of her nose, a move she must have unconsciously picked up from the Milky Way natives, "And you would like me to inform Colonel Sheppard?"

McKay shrugged, "Well, he does tend to respond more kindly toward beautiful women."

Teyla gave the astrophysicist a look, "All right, I will let him know; but please hurry, for all our sakes. I know that you are doing the best you can, but the Colonel will not be so understanding…especially when it comes to Elizabeth's wellbeing."

Rodney winced slightly at her words, "Don't I know it."

She smiled sympathetically then turned back the way she'd come, leaving the two scientists to their work.

_SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGSGASGA_

Glancing briefly at the man working alongside him, Ronon grabbed a handful of bandages and shoved them into a pack. Lorne's eagerness to get moving was palpable, rolling off of him in waves and filling the medical supply room with tension; it was starting to drive the Satedan mad. Ronon was seriously considering shooting the Major up with one of the drugs in the container marked "sedatives" when Teyla entered the room.

A smile automatically lit up his face, "How are things coming out there?"

Teyla's answering sigh was weary, "Drs. McKay and Zelenka have experienced a setback," her brow furrowed as she thought about the next part, "apparently there was a buildup of electricity in one of the Jumper's power coils and due to improper insulation, the electricity arced from the coil to one of the other systems, causing a malfunction."

Lorne whistled, "I'm not sure which is more amazing, the fact that McKay actually took time out to explain the situation to you, or the fact you remember what he said."

Teyla managed a tight grin, "Actually, it was Doctor Zelenka; he radioed me on my way to the infirmary because he believed it would be best for me to be able to relay the details of what had gone wrong."

Ronon nodded in sudden understanding, "So you told Sheppard," it wasn't a question, "How did he take it?"

She shrugged gracefully and started checking the modified first aid kit he'd put together, "He handled it better than I expected," she turned solemn eyes on the two men, "But I fear if something has happened to Dr. Weir he will never forgive himself."

Lorne unconsciously fiddled with a set of butterfly stitches, "It's ironic, you know? She's the only person who would be able to keep him levelheaded in a situation like this, and yet she's the only person who elicits this type of response from him."

Teyla nodded sadly and Ronon stared at his hands; neither of them said anything.

Lorne moved over to sit in between the two Pegasus natives, "So what do we do now?"

"We must wait," The frustration in Teyla's voice belied her almost serene pose.

Ronon grunted and fingered his gun, "I hate waiting."

_SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGA_

After pounding his fist into the pillow for the tenth time John deduced that A) The pillow wasn't going to get any fluffier, and B) the only reason he kept hitting it was because beating the crap out of something brought him a measure of satisfaction. The fact the force behind his punches was weaker than usual might have concerned him if there had been room in his head for anything but thoughts of _her_. He rolled over, making his bed and his aching bones creak. John knew he wouldn't be getting any sleep, despite Keller's insistence that he rest. Every time he closed his eyes he saw Elizabeth, possibly hurt and definitely alone, and he wondered how he was supposed to sleep on a comfortable bed when all she had was a hard cot…if that.

Part of him wanted to be angry with her for taking the fall, for not letting him make the sacrifice. It wasn't that he wanted the honor or the glory or anything like that; it was because it was his job to protect her. He should have been the one to give up everything to save her, not the other way around.

The other part of him, which consisted of the majority of his conscious and unconscious thoughts, was furious with himself for failing to do that job…for failing her. And he was terrified that he wouldn't be able to rectify his mistake. Something tore loose inside of him at the thought and John quickly repressed it. She would be fine; she had to be; if only because he couldn't imagine a world, a galaxy or the universe without her in it.

_Get some sleep? Yeah right…_


	7. Those Who See With Blinding Sight

**A/N: Hooray! I got this chapter a lot more quickly than the last one. Go me! Of course, it still took me about a month to update; but I'm improving! **

**And Kudos to Dylan Thomas for being an awesome poet! **

* * *

"Dr. Weir? Dr. Weir?!"

Elizabeth was slowly being forced awake by the sound of an insistent little voice. She tried to ignore whoever was so rudely interrupting her sleep, but the voice was soon joined by hands poking and prodding her, and when persistent fingers grasped her shirt and shook, the pain was enough to jolt her into full consciousness with a cry.

"Did I hurt you? I'm so sorry! I just saw you lying there and you weren't moving and I got scared!"

Elizabeth managed to open her one good eye to see Umi kneeling outside her cell, her tiny hands pressed through the bars. The poor girl's eyes were wide with fright and Elizabeth wondered what she was so scared of and why her tone sounded so urgent.

Elizabeth sluggishly lifted her head to assess the situation, but that small movement shifted her left arm and she had to bite back a scream as nauseating pain rolled through her.

Umi gasped in horror, "Oh…you're hurt bad!"

With those words it all came back to her in a flash and her body turned into one big ache. For a brief moment she cursed the slave girl's concern for her; it would have been better if she'd just slept forever. Then she thought of Atlantis, of her friends, of John; she couldn't bear the thought of them finding out she had given up without a fight. And what if they came to rescue her only to find she had breathed her last moments before? She couldn't do that to them or to herself. Elizabeth made a silent promise to stay strong as long as she could. _Do not go gentle into that good night…_ a line from an old poem crossed her mind and she almost smiled at the recollection of something normal.

"Thank you Umi," the words came out feebler than she would have liked, but they seemed to be enough for her young friend, who sighed in relief.

"Oh thank goodness! I was so worried!" Tears filled the girl's brilliant blue eyes and Elizabeth was reminded again of how young Umi was.

"Hey, it's okay. I'm okay, thanks to you," she filled her voice with as much reassurance as she could muster. She had no illusions about her condition, but Umi didn't need to know how serious it was. Elizabeth shivered, but attributed the sudden chill in her bones to the damp air wafting through the room.

The clomping of boots on the stairwell sent her companion scurrying behind a couple of barrels, and Elizabeth felt her heart fill with dread. Tamesis appeared in the doorway and she cursed the man's ability to impact her emotions.

"Hello Dr. Weir; how are we feeling today?" He approached her cell and spat on the ground right in front of her face.

Laughing, the prison guard wiped his face with the back of his sleeve and waited for a reaction. When he got none, Tamesis angrily kicked the bars and moved away. For one shining moment Elizabeth actually thought he was going to leave, but then she heard the rattle of keys and the sound of screeching metal; the next second his boots were inches from her nose.

"Get up," his gravelly voice resonated down to the floor.

She closed her eyes briefly and wondered what kind of a world could create such a cold, malevolent person.

"Get up!" Tamesis' growl was almost feral.

Elizabeth reached out with her good arm and grasped one of the cool, metal bars; taking a deep breath, she hauled herself across the ground. By the time she made it into an upright position she was sweating and shaking. When she paused to rest, Tamesis having apparently lost patience, bodily lifted her into the air and set her on her feet. This time she was actually thankful for the manhandling; she wasn't certain she ever would have made it into a standing position otherwise.

"Where are you taking me?" Elizabeth tried to keep her voice steady, but she couldn't stop the exhaustion and pain from creeping into her tone.

Tamesis snorted, "You're going to the fields."

Elizabeth laughed, surprising both him and herself.

"What is so amusing?" Tamesis was looking at her like she'd lost her mind; she wasn't so sure she hadn't.

"You think I can work like this?" She moved her good arm down to protectively cover her aching ribs.

The look the burly man sent her was one of cool indifference, "If you don't work then you become useless; we have no need for anything useless."

The not-so-subtle warning fell with all the finality of a judge's gavel. Elizabeth knew she had just received her sentence, and it would come at the hands of Azrael himself.

"There's a cart waiting for you outside," Tamesis eyed her with what could only be described as disdain. No doubt he was sick of having to deal with her.

Elizabeth was too busy thinking the feeling was mutual to notice a patch of sunshine go flying past her and into the prison guard.

"You can't take her!" Elizabeth's head whipped around to see Umi pounding her tiny fists into the enormous man's chest, "If you take her she'll get hurt worse!"

The next part seemed to happen in slow motion; Tamesis grabbed the young girl by the collar of her dirty dress and lifted her up into the air like she weighed nothing, then flung her into the wall with all his might.

"No…" Elizabeth breathed, willing the young girl to get up, to move…anything; but she didn't, and somehow Elizabeth knew she never would again.

"There, took care of that brat," Tamesis wiped his hands on his pants and spat on the ground.

Elizabeth thought she was going to be sick, "She was just a little girl!"

"She was a nuisance is what she was!" the prison guard practically shouted, his face turning red in anger.

Knowing that words, her weapon of choice, wouldn't work in this situation, Elizabeth fought back with her fists. It was a stupid, reckless thing to do, and another sign that John Sheppard had rubbed off on her. Her swing was weak, and every part of her body protested at the movement, but her aim was true. The soft tissue in Tamesis' nose caved under the force of her fist; it wasn't enough to break it, but it was enough to make blood come gushing out of his right nostril.

Tamesis recovered quickly however, and with a roar he had grabbed her around the neck and pinned her to the wall. She gasped and struggled feebly against his hold on her, but he just tightened his grip, making it harder for her to breathe.

He brought his face so close to hers that she could smell his reeking breath and nothing else. "I could kill you now," he snarled, "but I think it'll be more fun to watch you die under the hot sun."

He released her quite suddenly and Elizabeth fell to the ground, wheezing as she gulped air into her oxygen-starved lungs. She had managed to shield her mangled arm from the fall, but her chest felt like it was going to explode from her efforts to breathe.

Tamesis grabbed a fistful of her hair, and Elizabeth had to blink away a sudden onset of tears at this new, unexpected, and acute throbbing in her skull.

"Let's get on with it; I'm sick of waiting for you," the prison guard glanced down at her, then started dragging her in the direction of the door.

It was degrading, humiliating, painful, and likely the second to the last time someone would take her somewhere when she was powerless to stop them.

_I'm sorry John,_ Elizabeth closed her eyes in defeat.

… _Rage, rage against the dying of the light._


	8. Relativity

A/N: Okay, so I failed miserably at getting this updated quickly, but apparently my muse was thrown into overdrive after watching "Adrift" and "Lifeline," so I've started a collection of character pieces based on those episodes. I will get the next part of this story up sooner than this chapter. Thanks!

* * *

On P2X-358, the stargate suddenly burst to life; moments later a lone Puddlejumper rocketed through and shot upward, roaring through the planet's atmosphere and into the vast expanse of space. 

"Whew! That never gets old, does it?" Lorne exclaimed, the sensation momentarily overwhelming his concern over the situation.

"Yeah, it's fantastic; now could you focus on driving?" McKay was clutching his seat for dear life, his face a ghostly shade of pale.

"Rodney, he's going to need directions from you, you know," Sheppard's mouth twitched, but his eyes were hard.

Teyla, who was seated next to him, behind the pilot's seat, shot a cursory glance toward Ronon. The tall Satedan was actually standing in the back, gripping the sturdiest parts of the Jumper's internal anatomy to steady himself. He gave her a short nod and she smiled in return before turning her attention to the team's leader. John was holding up well enough, although she had seen him wince when he was strapping in; and there was something else, something Teyla couldn't place, a strange gleam in his eye that made her wonder what, exactly, he was thinking about. Frankly, it had her concerned.

"That's the moon, right up there," McKay gestured toward the large red satellite orbiting the planet they'd just departed.

"All right; what do I do?" Lorne paused with his hands over the controls.

"Just a minute," Rodney pulled out his handheld and quickly connected it to the Jumper's mainframe.

"McKay, we're coming up on it kind of fast," The major's fingers twitched nervously.

"I know that," the astrophysicist snapped, "This isn't as simple as point and click. What we're about to attempt is a variation on a free return trajectory; this **is** rocket science."

"Okay, I understand that…" Lorne quickly replied.

"As soon as we reach the moon's gravitational field, you're going to need to kill the power," McKay interrupted.

The major nodded tightly.

"Kill the power?" Teyla inquired delicately.

"Excuse me, who's the scientist here?" Rodney snarked rhetorically, "Please save your questions until after the presentation."

Teyla frowned, "I was just wondering if the artificial gravity would be affected."

"Everything but life support will be turned off," John shifted in his seat, "We'll need all the extra power we can get."

"Oh, well if that is the case perhaps…"

"Kill it now!" Teyla was abruptly cut off by McKay's barked order; and a second later, everything went black. The lights from the main console cast an eerie glow on the Jumper's interior. She felt herself suddenly rise in her seat until her body reached the stretching limits of the restraints, and marveled at the strange sensation.

"Thanks for the heads-up McKay," Ronon was hovering against the ceiling, rubbing the back of his head.

"I was going to warn you," Teyla smiled and shrugged.

"All right, since we had so much velocity going in, it should only be a matter of minutes before we make it around to the checkpoint," Rodney's eyes shifted from his computer to the Jumper's display and back again, "When I tell you, give it a good boost of speed and then kill it again."

"How will I know how much power to use?" Lorne watched the scientist out of the corner of his eye.

"I could give you the exact calculation, but I doubt you'd understand it, "McKay commented condescendingly.

"Thanks," Lorne's tone was decidedly sarcastic.

"Anytime," Rodney was just as facetious, "And to answer your question, the Jumper knows how much power to use."

"It knows?" John looked dubious.

"Yes, it's already been calculated into the program," McKay elaborated, "All the major has to do is activate it."

"Right," Lorne breathed, "I'll just think of 'The Flash'."

"Or the Roadrunner," Ronon offered from above.

Lorne gave Sheppard an inquisitive look, "Numbing alien minds again, sir?"

John threw up his hands defensively, "Hey, Looney Tunes is a huge part of American Culture."

"Which would certainly explain a few things," McKay mumbled under his breath.

John ignored the astrophysicist, "Besides, I would have picked Quicksilver."

"Mystique was way cooler," Rodney interjected.

Sheppard rolled his eyes, "She didn't have super speed; how does that help?"

McKay shrugged a shoulder, "She was hot."

It was not all that long ago when Teyla would have found such a conversation in the middle of a crisis strange. She had noticed the people of Earth's tendency to make jokes in the worst circumstances and had thought them to be unfeeling. It had been Elizabeth herself who had explained that they used humor as a defense mechanism, to keep their feelings at bay in order to do what needed to be done. She was not sure she entirely understood the concept, but now the Athosian simply joined in. "Is that not the blue woman who can change her body into that of another person?" She raised an eyebrow.

"McKay likes a little variety," Lorne smiled briefly.

Rodney snorted, "Yes. Ha ha, very funny; and if you'd take time away from your 'Let's harass the genius' routine, you'd notice that we are rapidly nearing our checkpoint."

The major was instantly alert, "Just tell me when."

John half turned in his seat, "Hey Chewie, you might wanna…"

"Bring all systems back online…now." Rodney jabbed his finger for emphasis.

Immediately, the Jumper whirred to life. A muffled thud followed by a grunt sounded from the back.

"You know, it might be a good idea to install some more seats in these babies," Lorne remarked offhandedly as he cut off the power again.

"Yes, so the next time we rewrite the laws of physics, everyone will be comfortable," McKay replied peevishly.

Lorne whistled long and low, "Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."

Teyla eyed him quizzically, "Is it an Earth custom to rise from a certain area of one's bed?"

"Okay," Rodney held his hands up in the air in the 'I surrender' position, "Could we please conduct the psychopath convention at a later date? Some of us are trying to get work done."

John cleared his throat and tapped his fingers on the chair's armrest, "How much longer until we get there?"

"Hmmm, well, let's see," McKay scratched his head, "traveling at our current rate of speed we should be there in approximately…13.4 years."

"Rodney," Sheppard ground his teeth.

"Okay, okay! Once we fire up the power again it should take about a half an hour to reach the planet."

"And when will you turn the power back on?" Ronon had his arms crossed and his back to the ceiling.

"When we reach the point farthest away from Ontarik where we'll be able to make it to the planet without sucking the cells dry," McKay exhaled sharply in exasperation.

"I just wanted a little warning this time," Ronon looked at the scientist pointedly.

"You'd better grab a hold of something sturdy big guy, because I doubt you're going to get it," Lorne advised.

"It won't be long," McKay reported tersely.

"Hang on Elizabeth; we're coming," John whispered, unconsciously clenching his fists.

_SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGA_


	9. Fission

A/N: Okay, so this chapter is pretty short, but I felt the need to get another part of this story up before I watched next week's episode; just, you know...in case something awful occurs and I happen to lose my inspiration.

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Lorne engaged the cloak as soon as they entered the atmosphere; and the Puddle Jumper touched down on Ontarish soil a few moments later. 

"All right," the major slung his arm through his P-90's strap with practiced ease, "Ronon, Teyla, you're with me; Colonel Sheppard and Dr. McKay will stay with the Jumper."

Rodney crossed his arms, "And why, may I ask, do I have to stay behind?"

Lorne waved his hand across the hatch' control panel, "Because things could get very ugly, very fast; and we're going to need a ride out of here. You might end up having to come to us."

He raised his gun and strode down the ramp, Teyla behind him and Ronon bringing up the rear.

"Good luck," John called after them, anxiety etched in his face.

"Don't worry sir; we'll bring her back," Lorne paused and saluted, then spun on his heel and broke into a jog.

Rodney's expression softened at the look in his friend's eyes, "She'll be okay, Sheppard."

John sighed heavily, then winced as the movement pulled on his bruised muscles, "I wish I was as sure of that as you."

"That's why I'm the smart one," McKay awkwardly patted the Colonel's shoulder, then plopped down in the pilot's chair to await word from their teammates.

_SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGA_

"Where do you think they're keeping her?" Lorne peeked around the building corner.

Ronon kept his back pressed to the wall, all his senses on alert, "My guess would be that she's still in the prison."

Lorne rolled his eyes, "No kidding; where might that be?"

"It is the large building located next to the Council House," Teyla whispered loudly from the house across from them, glancing down the gap in between the buildings.

"I'm guessing the Council House is that huge collection of towers?" Lorne motioned with his gun over the roofs of the houses.

"That's it," Ronon switched the setting on his gun from 'stun' to 'kill.'

Feeling Teyla's eyes on him, he shrugged, "They picked the wrong group of people to mess with."

Her jaw was set, "I just wanted to make sure you were not taking any chances."

Ronon grinned ferally, "Never do."

Teyla's eyes glittered dangerously, "Good."

"Neither do I," Lorne pulled out a block of C4 and tossed it to the former Runner, "I'm assuming the chair is in one of those towers?"

Teyla nodded, "I believe it is in the one farthest from us."

"Well that's convenient," the major glanced around the corner then turned back and straightened, "All right, as a backup plan I want the two of you to take that C4 and set it up where it'll cause a lot of damage, preferably to those gun turrets. After that, make your way to the prison and find Elizabeth. I'm going to head for that chair. If I don't contact you in ten minutes I want you to arm that sucker, have McKay fly in as close as he dares, and try to get Dr. Weir out of here; it'll be a lot riskier, but if this whole thing goes south it'll be our only option."

Ronon crossed his arms, "What about you?"

Lorne shook his head, "She's more important." He grinned wryly, "And besides, if we go back without her I'm a dead man anyway; I might as well go out doing my duty."

Teyla laid a hand on his shoulder, "You are very brave Major Lorne."

He shook his head, "More like incredibly stupid, but thanks anyway," he flashed her a smile. "All right, let's get this show on the road."

In a manner reminiscent of the woman they were trying to save, Teyla uttered a soft "Be safe."

Eyes flickering between his two companions, Lorne touched a hand to his cap, "You too; and good luck."

Ronon nodded curtly; and then the team split into two, each with a different task, but fueled by the same desperate objective.

_SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGA_

Ronon slid to a stop and slapped the block of C4 to the turret's base. Teyla crouched down next to him, her gun at the ready, "I do not believe anyone saw us."

The Satedan turned to look at her, "That's good, because one of us is going to have to stay here."

Understanding dawned on her face, "Someone must be here to arm the explosive should we need it."

Ronon inclined his head, "It would be a bad idea to leave it unguarded. I'll stay behind; you head to the prison."

Teyla shook her head emphatically, "You should go after Dr. Weir; she may not be well enough to move without assistance."

He grimaced slightly, "Good point."

Teyla glanced out into the street, "You should go now while it is clear."

Ronon nodded and tapped his earpiece, "I'll keep in touch." And then he was gone, employing that almost feline grace as he skirted along the wall and disappeared from her sight.

_SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGA_


	10. Tears, Idle Tears

The prison was just as he remembered it: dank, cold, and smelling of stale urine and mold. His footsteps echoing as his boots hit the stone floor, Ronon headed for the cell that the team had inhabited during their brief stay in the city. The cells lining the walls were vacant, but Ronon wasn't too surprised; he remembered them being empty the last time had been there. It did seem a little strange, however, that they had been the Ontarish' only prisoners, but he hadn't really had time to wonder about what he'd observed.

He found their cell in the exact state they'd left it; the door was still hanging wide open, and the control panel opposite was still destroyed. Needless to say, there was no Dr. Weir. He quickly backtracked, double-checking the other cells as he went. His second observation matched the first; there was no one else there.

Ronon was about to contact his teammates when he noticed a smear of blood near his feet. When he bent down to examine it, he noticed a spotted trail of the dark red liquid leading to a small door hidden in the shadows. He tried the handle, only to find it jammed; without wasting a second he threw himself against the rotting wood and grunted in satisfaction when the door popped completely off its hinges.

The room beyond the newly cleared entryway was dark, and it took a few moments for Ronon's eyes to adjust to the lack of light. During that time the familiar stench of death wafted up a rapidly materializing staircase, making his nostrils flare in distaste. His disgust quickly turned to concern and he took the stairs down two at a time. At the bottom of the stairwell, he lit a flare and threw it into the middle of the room. In the red glow Ronon could see a series of rusty lamps lining the wall closest to him; the quick dip of a finger in one revealed the oil to be warm. Someone had been down there recently. He could see the faint outline of a small cell, similar to the cages the Satedans had used to transport large animals, in the middle of the room. Curious feet carried him closer to the bars, and when he peered inside the cell he saw a standard issue Atlantis expedition jacket crumpled in the corner. He ran inside and picked it up, noticing as he did so that the fabric appeared to be covered in a fine grey dust. There were traces of the same substance on the thin blanket he found on the floor.

Ronon tapped his earpiece, "Weir's not here, but I found where they were keeping her."

"What?" Lorne's surprised inquiry came in a whisper.

Teyla's confused voice floated over the airwave, "Where else could she possibly be?"

Ronon shrugged automatically, forgetting for a moment that no one could see him, "I don't know, but she left her jacket behind, and there's some sort of grey dust on it." He didn't mention the blood stains and tears that he'd discovered marring the material.

There was a pause before Teyla replied, "Perhaps it would be best for us to regroup."

"I'm standing outside the Council House," Lorne murmured, "and I think it would be best if I keep heading for the control chair."

Ronon slung Elizabeth's jacket over his shoulder and exited the cell, "All right; Teyla, I'm coming to you."

"Understood," she signed off.

Just as he was bending down to retrieve the flare, Ronon saw a crumpled form lying in the shadows. The sinking feeling in his stomach was quickly allayed when he realized the body was too small to be that of an adult. That relief turned to disgust as he realized the implications of that fact. He backtracked and grabbed the blanket he'd seen on the floor, then carefully covered the little girl with it. After briefly bowing his head, he turned and ran up the stairs toward Teyla with the hopes of reaching someone he could still save.

_SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGA_

Rodney stared at his hands as the last of their teammates' transmission filled the unbearable silence of the puddlejumper. He risked a glance at the team's injured leader, whose white knuckles were the only evidence he was feeling anything at all.

"I'm sure Elizabeth is okay," Rodney was pretty sure that his repeated assurances were getting rather old, but he didn't have anything better to offer; and the constant assertions and suppositions he spouted were as much for his own benefit as anyone else's.

"Why wouldn't she be there?" John sounded calm enough, but McKay had known him long enough to hear the underlying panic in his voice.

"Maybe they decided to move her somewhere nicer…" Rodney cringed as soon as the words were out of his mouth; it sounded like a stretch even to him.

"Right, and then maybe they decided to bring her tea and cupcakes," Sheppard countered sarcastically.

McKay sighed, "Yeah okay, so that's not the most likely possibility; but I still think she's fine, wherever she is."

"She's in trouble, McKay."

Rodney was about to retort that that was the whole point of their mission when he noticed John's eyes had widened and his back had gone ramrod-straight.

"What? What is it?"

Sheppard just kept staring straight ahead, "I don't know, I just…I know we need to find her soon."

"Yes, I believe that's what Ronon and Teyla are working on as we speak," Rodney snarked.

"McKay," John's tone carried a warning.

"I'm sorry; I just tend to react badly when I have no idea what's going on and someone tells me one of my friends is in imminent danger!" he shot back defensively.

"Get one of them on the radio," Sheppard sounded unapologetic.

"One of who? Our teammates who at this very moment might be trying to stay hidden?" Rodney was incredulous.

John winced as he pushed himself out of his chair, "Fine, I'll do it."

Rodney snatched the radio just as John reached the copilot's chair, "No I'll do it; I might be able to make you sound less crazy."

_SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGA_

Ronon had just reached Teyla's position when his radio crackled, "Um, Sheppard wants you guys to hurry it up a bit; he seems to think that Elizabeth's in major trouble."

The two Pegasus natives exchanged a look.

"Does he have any less vague information, like where she might be?" Ronon tried to keep the sarcastic edge out of his voice, but had a feeling he failed. He made a mental note to spend less time with McKay.

"I'm working on that one," came the Colonel's dry reply.

"Right." Ronon sighed.

"We shall do our best," Teyla assured the other half of their team, then tapped her radio and moved closer to the ex-Runner, "What are we going to do?" She was worrying her bottom lip, another habit she must have acquired from their comrades.

"It's time to try a new tactic," Ronon flipped the setting on his gun back to 'stun' and in one smooth motion, turned the corner and squeezed off a shot which struck a passing guard in the foot.

The man's leg buckled, and Ronon jumped out and grabbed the man before he could fall, then dragged him back to their hiding place.

"Did anyone see you?" Teyla's gaze darted over the street.

"It would've been pretty hard to miss," Ronon answered gruffly.

"What do you want?" The guard, who looked like he was barely old enough to grow facial hair, eyed them warily.

Teyla made sure the young man could see her fingering her gun, "There is a woman your people are holding captive…"

"Where is she?" Ronon broke in, grabbing the guard's collar roughly.

Faced with nearly two hundred pounds of angry Satedan, the man broke into a sweat, "I uh…I'm not sure who you're talking about."

Ronon didn't buy it, "She was the only prisoner you had; you couldn't have missed her."

"The only prisoner?" The guard looked genuinely confused, "We have lots of prisoners; they all work in the fields during the daylight hours."

Teyla caught Ronon's eye, then turned her attention back to their captive, "And where are these fields?"

The guard pointed to the West.

"Thanks," Ronon released the man, then shot him square in the chest, "Your reward is a nice long nap."

Just then their earpieces came to life. "I'm in the room with the Control Chair," Lorne announced breathlessly.

Teyla's brow furrowed, "Are you all right?"

"There were a lot of stairs," Lorne explained, "followed by a couple of rather large guards; but I don't think anyone noticed me."

"Except for the guards," Ronon pointed out.

"True," Lorne acknowledged. "So what's the plan?"

Teyla was biting her lip again, "Did you get Sheppard's message?"

A pause, then, "No, I had my earpiece turned off. What did he say?"

"He thinks we need to hurry." Teyla cut to the chase, "We found out that the prisoners work in the fields to the West of here, so we are going to check it out."

"Stay put," Ronon added, "We may need you."

"I'll be here," Lorne affirmed.

Ronon flipped his gun's setting, then watched as Teyla brought her P-90 to her chest, "Let's go."

She nodded, and the two of them quickly set off, ducking in and out of buildings' shadows as they set off in the direction they'd been pointed toward.


	11. Leaning into the Light

**A/N:** Yeah, so I realize it's been forever since I updated this story, but I really am still working on it; I promise! 

* * *

"No! We're staying right here!" Rodney spread his arms across the control panel, looking for all the world like a child hoarding his toys. 

"Look at how far away that is, McKay," John waved toward the sketchy map of the planet that the Jumper had constructed using its sensors, "The closest uninhabited area large enough to be a field is over a mile away from Teyla and Ronon." 

Rodney tried to reason with him, "I understand that; but you're injured and I barely know how to hold a gun, let alone take out any resistance we might come across."

"They won't reach her in time!" Sheppard exclaimed, anxiety forcing the hairs on the back of his neck away from his skin.

"In time for what?! You've got to stop with all this cryptic Edgar Cayce psychobabble!" Rodney's voice had gone up an octave.

John sighed heavily, "McKay, you have got to trust me."

Rodney narrowed his eyes, "Why? Because I have to tell you, you're not inspiring a lot of that particular quality right now."

"Because even though I'm hurt, I could still bash you over the head and take control if I wanted to," John's smile was without a trace of humor, "And because you're my friend."

"Oh yeah? Well friends don't let friends fly Puddlejumpers into possible combat situations when two days before they were bleeding in the infirmary," Rodney shot back quickly; but one look at the Colonel had him vacating his seat. "On the other hand, you're right about your badge of excellence in barbarian tactics."

John moved to the now empty pilot's chair, "Thanks McKay."

Rodney waved him off, "Hey, you're the one threatening violence here; I just want to make sure I'm conscious so I can fly off and leave when you get yourself captured."

John rolled his eyes as the Jumper lifted into the air, "Thanks for the vote of confidence."

_SGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGASGA_

As she stumbled out of the cart, Elizabeth used her right arm to shield her eyes from the harsh glare of not one, but two suns. The bright light felt like hundreds of tiny daggers lancing through her skull.

"Hey y'all, lookie who came back!" The prisoners' ringleader announced with a sneer.

She felt another wave of nausea pass over her, but she swallowed hard and somehow managed to keep from vomiting.

"She don't look too happy to see us," the man chortled loudly and the other workers joined in.

"Nobody is to lay a hand on Dr. Weir, understand?" Tamesis barked out. When angry mutterings started coming from those assembled he continued, "Because this lovely lady here is going to be doing everyone's share of the work."

A ragged cheer erupted from the prisoners, and Mr. Instigator took the chunk of rock he'd just split off and hurled it at Elizabeth's feet.

"Get a move on," Tamesis pushed her forward and she promptly tripped over the large boulder that had been placed in her way.

How she managed to right herself she would never know, but somehow she kept from falling flat on her face. A woman with ratty auburn hair shoved one of the hoe-shaped objects used to cleave stone at her hands and Elizabeth grabbed hold with her good one.

She dragged the tool to her usual workplace and half-heartedly swung it at a large rock. It wasn't easy to do with one arm, especially when her ribs were likely cracked, and the instrument bounced off the stone and flew out of her hand. She was just starting to bend down to get it when a foot caught her in the back and she tumbled into the rock bed. Though slightly more malleable, the coarse stone was a bit like granite and the tiny crystal shards scraped into her knees as she landed.

The prison guard loomed over her, "Make a real effort."

Elizabeth got slowly to her feet, sweating in exertion. The hoe-tool was shoved at her again and she took her place in front of the rock slab.

"Swing now!" Something whistled through the air and Elizabeth screamed and felt her knees buckle as fire blossomed between her shoulder blades. 

Tamesis had brought his whip.

She couldn't help the tears that squeezed out of her eyes, but she swung that tool with all her might.

It felt like she'd been beaten all over again. 

Elizabeth's knees buckled and she crumpled to the ground once more; she didn't even bother to try to stop herself. Her body simply couldn't take it anymore and she knew it. No one could say she hadn't tried.

She closed her eyes and waited for the inevitable blows to fall…but they didn't.

She must have blacked out for a moment because the next time she opened her eyes, it was to see something she had scarcely wished to hope for…an honest to goodness Puddlejumper setting down less than fifty yards ahead of her.

When the back hatch opened however, she realized she must still be unconscious and dreaming it all up because it was Rodney who came barreling out in full military gear with a P-90 aimed at Tamesis. It was such a ridiculous sight she knew it couldn't really be happening.

"Get away from her!" Elizabeth was impressed; her dream world was able to capture the nervous panic in McKay's voice; it was exactly how he would have sounded in a situation like this.

Tamesis backed away from her slowly. "You'll never get out of here alive," he snarled, "We'll shoot you right out of the sky."

"Oh yes, your gun turrets." Now Elizabeth knew she had to be dreaming because that sounded exactly like…

"I don't think they'll really be a problem." Oh yeah, that was John piloting the Jumper, and there was no way they'd let him out of the infirmary so none of this could be real.

"Then you would be wrong," the burly prison guard sneered, "Our guns are powerful enough to take out a puny little ship like yours."

"Oh, we're well aware of that," John's derisive snort was amplified through the intercom, "but we've got a man in your control chair who's just itching to blast them to pieces."

Almost as if on command, a loud explosion sounded in the distance, and a ball of fire erupted toward the sky.

Tamesis and the rest of the workers stared wide-eyed at the fiery conflagration. 

"You just took out our only means of defense!" The guard's eyes hardened in anger.

"Actually, we only destroyed one," McKay spoke for the first time since his dramatic exit from the Jumper, "I was able to estimate the expected range of your weapons and found that destroying one opens up a safe zone for us to fly to the 'gate."

Elizabeth saw Tamesis' mouth tighten and his hands curl into fists.

"My arrogant friend is right," John chimed in, "And Major Lorne will be staying in the chair to make sure no one tries anything funny while we escape…or in case McKay's estimations are wrong."

Rodney turned his head to glare at John and in that moment, the enraged guard lunged at Elizabeth.

Knowing instinctively that she wouldn't be able to move out of the way fast enough, Elizabeth curled herself into as small a ball as possible, ignoring the grating pain in her chest. A split second later, Tamesis collapsed less than a foot in front of her, a smoking hole in his back.

Running along the cart path at the edge of the quarry were Ronon and Teyla. Ronon had his gun aimed at the now lifeless prison guard, and Teyla was sweeping her P-90 across the group of prisoners.

Elizabeth slowly relaxed her body, thankful for the near perfect timing of her team, relieved that the situation had ended as well as it had, and most of all, grateful that it had all been real.


	12. Hold the Rain

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**A/N: I'm back! Hooray for me! Sorry that it took me for-ev-er to post this, but I've been fighting a combination of apathy and writer's block. It shouldn't take me as long to update the next time though, so just hang in there. Enjoy!**

* * *

John allowed his shoulders to loosen infinitesimally; they weren't out of the woods yet, but he felt a lot better about the whole situation with that giant guard out of the way.

He felt the tension he'd lost come rushing back when he noticed that Elizabeth wasn't moving.

Rodney turned an expression full of anxiety and dismay to the cockpit, and John had to swallow his rising panic at the look in the scientist's eyes.

Teyla, her gun never wavering, ran to their fallen leader, Ronon close on her heels.

John tried to slow his racing heart as he switched over to the headset, "Guys?"

"She's alive," Teyla's voice was full of relief.

Before John could relax once more, Ronon's gruff voice added, "But she's hurt bad, Sheppard."

He swallowed hard as he watched the Satedan bend down next to Elizabeth's still form, "How bad?"

"We must return to Atlantis quickly." The statement Teyla gave in lieu of an actual answer gave him all the information he needed.

John briefly passed a hand over his face, fear for Elizabeth and anger at those who'd harmed her warring for supremacy in his mind, He was fairly certain that if Tamesis wasn't already dead he would have done something rash—something like running out of the Jumper and attacking the pompous, abhorrent, rotten excuse for a human being. As it was he was keeping a wary eye on the other prisoners. Something about them set him on edge; and if one of them so much as looked at Elizabeth in a threatening way he wouldn't hesitate to fire a drone and open up a crater the size of a baseball diamond where that person was standing. Earlier he'd sent Rodney out armed, not only as a visual warning, but because he knew the destructive power of the Jumper's ancient ammunition and he didn't want innocent bystanders to get hurt. Now that he had a feeling they weren't all that ingenuous, he had no qualms about pulverizing the lot of them where they stood.

John knew he didn't need to tell Teyla to keep her guard up; the Athosian warrior was always on the alert. There was something about her stance though, that had him wondering if she was just as suspicious of the workers as he was.

Ronon, being gentler than John would have thought possible, lifted Elizabeth into the relative safety of his arms and started for the Jumper. At exactly the same moment, Teyla swiveled to cover his six, her eyes and gun never leaving the assembly. The prisoners didn't move though; they just watched silently.

It was a bit unnerving, but John wasn't about to complain.

His gaze still tracking the remainder of his team, he half-turned toward the Jumper's entrance, "Rodney, pack it in!"

Looking like he was going to be sick, McKay moved around and staggered through the hatch, his noisy arrival catching the Colonel's full attention. The astrophysicist seemed to be in shock.

John swore inwardly; now was not the time for any one of them to lose it. "Rodney, I need you to snap out of it," his tone was as brusque and commanding as he could make it.

"It was my fault," the scientist squeezed his eyes shut.

"No it wasn't McKay; it was mine," John answered forcefully, "Now I need you to do something for me. Contact Lorne and see if he can make it to the rendezvous point or if he needs our help to get out of that tower."

Rodney nodded numbly and tapped his headset as he sat in the copilot's chair. John felt a touch of relief; he could have just as easily contacted the major, but McKay needed something to distract him.

That momentary relief was squashed as the rest of his team came barreling into the Jumper.

John's breath caught somewhere in his chest when Elizabeth came close enough for him to see her condition. One arm was bent at an unnatural angle and it looked as though every breath she took was a struggle. Her face was a mass of cuts and bruises and her right eye had swollen shut; the eye he could see was clouded with pain. He would never be able to erase the image from his mind.

Rising out of his seat he reached soundlessly for her, nausea boring a hole in his stomach. He made as if to take a step forward, itching to run to her side; but guilt and shock kept his feet rooted to the ground.

"Sheppard!" Ronon's gruff voice cut through the fog, "We need to get moving!"

Purpose gave him the strength needed to tear his eyes from Elizabeth's face and stumble into his seat.

As if sensing his turmoil, the Jumper lurched off the ground as soon as his hands touched the control panel, before he even had a chance to formulate a conscious command.

"Lorne wants to remind you that if he leaves for the rendezvous point now, he won't be able to cover our passage through the city," Rodney cautioned, gripping the panel with one hand to steady himself.

"That's a chance we're going to have to take," John gritted his teeth.

McKay's confirming nod was nearly imperceptible as he relayed the information with the speed and precision of a soldier.

John could hear Teyla and Ronon conversing in hushed, strained tones as they tended to Elizabeth in the back; and he had to resist the urge to glance over his shoulder, knowing the thin hold on self-control keeping him in the pilot's seat would dissipate if he did so. _She's going to be fine; it looks worse than it really is. She won't leave you; she can't di…"_

"Sheppard; look out!"

Rodney's yelped warning was all it took for John's flight reflexes to kick in. His brain briefly registered that the Jumper was coasting too low and they were coming in on a rather tall building very quickly; then in the next second he had them spinning to the side and up, clearing the tower by inches.

A strangled cry sounded from the back during the sharp maneuvers and John broke into an icy sweat, his ears roaring as self-reproach and fear washed over him in a cold wave.

The snarky comment he expected from Rodney didn't come, nor did the silent disapproval of his other teammates. Instead he got a look of understanding from the scientist and a gentle touch on the shoulder from Teyla which soothed his frazzled nerves.

"She is stable," the beautiful Athosian calmly announced.

_For now…_ John didn't need her to actually say the words; he could hear the addendum just the same.

Still, he was afforded enough peace of mind by that one statement that he was able to fly the remaining distance without further incident. Almost before they had even touched down, he was out of his chair and hobbling toward the rear. Elizabeth was lying completely still, her eyes closed, and for a moment he feared the worst.

"Dr. Weir is merely sleeping," Teyla hurried to reassure him, and it was then that he noticed the faint rise and fall of Elizabeth's chest.

John knelt achingly by the unconscious woman's side, wanting so badly to reach out and touch her, to reassure himself that she was alive and here, to offer her some comfort; but he held back, not wanting to do more harm than good. He had already done so much to hurt her. Now that he was watching her closely, he could see the little hitches in her chest as she inhaled. He had done that to her; he didn't know how or why she'd sustained her injuries, but he did know he was as much to blame for her pain as the scum who had physically caused her harm.

He stayed like that, just watching her breathe, Ronon and Teyla standing like silent sentinels at his back until Lorne reached the rendezvous point five minutes later. John quickly passed the metaphorical reins to the young major.

"Lorne, I need…" Sheppard paused, unsure of how to word his request without giving his true reasons for giving it. Luckily his comrade understood as soon as he saw Elizabeth.

The major's eyes widened and he cleared his throat, nodding as he did so, "We'll be home in no time sir." He quickly dumped his gear in the corner and snaked his way through the crowded jumper, yelling back as he did so, "Just keep her with us!"


	13. Primum non Nocere

_**A/N: Okay, so it's kind of a short chapter but yay! I updated!**_

* * *

There had been many times over the past year that Jennifer Keller had regretted agreeing to be the head of medicine for the Atlantis expedition, but never did that regret resonate as strongly as when one of the city's flagship team was injured. The responsibility rested most heavily on her shoulders when Sheppard's team came through the 'gate with the term 'casualty' attached to their arrival.

Or so she had thought; but now, as she waited at the foot of the stargate with her team of battle-tested professionals, she realized just how mistaken she'd been. The heart and soul of the expedition was about to become a resident of her infirmary, and she felt the terrifying burden of the task at hand settle into the spot where her scapula and her clavicle converged.

"All right people; look sharp!" she barked as the chevrons started to engage.

The wormhole connected with its usual show of watery fireworks, but Keller didn't have time to enjoy the sight; her whole body was taut with anticipation as she awaited the off-world team.

The expected Jumper suddenly burst from the event horizon and then shuddered to a halt.

As the back hatch lowered, Keller would have sworn that it was doing so more slowly than it had in the past; she'd have to let Zelenka know about it later.

And speaking of genius scientists, there was McKay, a P-90 hanging loosely from his limp fingers. He looked so dejected and mournful that for a moment, she feared the worst. His eyes briefly flickered to meet hers before he turned them back to the semi-darkness of the tiny ship's interior. That was when Keller realized she still had a patient. Her feet started moving of their own accord and she crossed the floor so quickly that her team was left scrabbling to catch up.

The scene that greeted her when she reached the hatch pulled at her heartstrings despite the vaunted professionalism that came with years of practicing medicine. Colonel Sheppard was folded nearly in half; and though his hair, sticking up in more directions than usual, was all she could see, his entire posture was made up of broken lines and bent angles. Curled on the floor with her head in his lap was Elizabeth Weir. Sheppard had her right hand in a death grip and his other hand was nestled in her dark curls, his thumb tracing invisible circles on her forehead in an attempt to erase the creases pain had painted there.

Ronon was hunched up against the wall, his impenetrable eyes fixed on his two leaders, with Teyla's petite form nearly invisible in his shadow. The tall Satedan noticed the doctor's arrival first, and with the lightest of touches alerted his Athosian companion to her presence.

"Dr. Keller," Teyla acknowledged her with the softest of whispers, concern etched in her features.

"How's she doing?" Keller quickly knelt in front in Sheppard, her practiced eye sweeping over both leaders' forms.

"She's been unconscious since I came on board, about ten minutes ago," Lorne emerged from the cockpit.

"Elizabeth's left arm was noticeably dislocated when we found her," Teyla offered, moving to stand near Keller's shoulder, "But with the other injuries we fear she has, we did not attempt to reset it."

Keller nodded tensely; she had noticed the odd twist in Dr. Weir's arm the instant she'd entered the jumper. The only injuries more prevalent were the bruises marring her fair skin and the gurgling hitch the wounded woman's breathing attained every time she inhaled.

"Broken ribs," Sheppard spoke for the first time, seeming to follow her train of thought.

_Which means a probable punctured lung and serious surgery,_ Keller grimaced.

After briefly checking Dr. Weir's spine and neck she turned and started barking out orders, "Adams, Delancy, I need a gurney; Sanchez, radio ahead and have them prep the scanner."

"She's going to be okay, right?" Rodney suddenly appeared in her line of sight, something that looked suspiciously like guilt written on his features.

"We're going to do everything we can," Keller recited the noncommittal answer she'd learned from her days as an intern.

John climbed painfully to his feet as Elizabeth was lifted onto the gurney, his stance making it clear that he had no intention of leaving her side.

Keller sent him a pointed glance, "Don't worry about it Sheppard; you two are going to the same place," she motioned for another gurney to be brought over.

Sheppard's eyes narrowed and she thought she was in for a fight, but all he said was, "I can walk you know."

She quickly placed an oxygen mask over Elizabeth's face and gave the setup a quick once-over, "True, but we both know you'll get to the infirmary faster if we give you a ride."

Sheppard's jaw clenched as he glanced from her to Elizabeth; and Keller knew she had him.

Maybe she'd celebrate later.

"Adams, you and I are going to wheel Dr. Weir to the infirmary. Delancy, you and Gerard take Colonel Sheppard," they started moving before the words were even out of her mouth.

She paused, motioning for her colleagues to keep going, and fixed the rest of the team with her best no-nonsense look, "As for the rest of you, I expect to see you all shortly for your post-mission examinations."

The four pairs of eyes that met hers held varying degrees of agreement, and for the moment that was all she could ask for.

As she hurried to catch up with her patients, Jennifer Keller mentally sighed even as she felt the adrenaline surge through her veins.

After this was all over and Dr. Weir was on the mend—_because this isn't going to end any other way,_ she told herself firmly—maybe she would talk to the head of the expedition again about finding a more suitable head doctor.

Because the weight on her shoulders was now equal to that of the ancient city itself.


	14. The Sum of All Human Wisdom

* * *

"How long have they been in there?"

"It has been only ten minutes since the last time you asked, Rodney," Teyla replied tiredly.

"Quit pacing before I shoot you," Ronon groused, moving a hand to his hip for emphasis.

The scientist abruptly plopped down on one of the beds, "So that means it's been an hour and a half? That can't be a good sign, can it?"

"McKay," Ronon rumbled in warning, pointedly eyeing the other man's now swinging legs.

"No, I mean it," he didn't take the hint, "She's been in there a long time…"

"Rodney!" Teyla snapped, "That's enough!"

Out of the corner of his eye, John saw her glance in his direction. She was worried about him, Ronon too. As soon as they were able, the two of them had acquired what must have been the most uncomfortable chairs available and taken up protective posts on either side of his bed.

In reality, he hadn't been paying much attention to his teammates; his gaze was riveted to the doorway through which Keller and Elizabeth had exited since the nurses had finished poking him with needles an hour earlier. McKay had come out of his shock halfway through their examinations and had felt the need to make up for his earlier silence; so John did what he needed to do to keep from strangling the astrophysicist—he ignored him.

"Elizabeth is a very strong woman," Teyla broke the sudden silence, "She is a fighter."

"I think the prison guard learned that the hard way," Ronon commented offhandedly.

That caught John's attention, "What do you mean?"

Ronon smirked, "She punched him."

"She what?" McKay sputtered.

The Satedan shrugged, "I guess he must have made her mad, because his nose wasn't in good shape."

"How do you know it was her?" Teyla inquired softly.

Glancing briefly toward the other end of the infirmary, he shrugged again, "Intuition. I don't see who else would have had the guts to pop him one."

Teyla smiled in agreement and John felt his heart well with pride, _Thatta girl, Elizabeth!_

"Huh," Rodney looked suitably impressed, "It looks like you rubbed off on her, Sheppard."

"What's that supposed to mean?" John narrowed his eyes.

"No really," McKay grinned, "How do you think it happened, Conan? Do you think the guard baited Elizabeth to the point where sarcastic comebacks just wouldn't cut it and she popped him one?"

The tall Satedan cleared his throat, and the flippant tone their conversation had attained quickly evaporated.

"I think…" Ronon hesitated, glancing at his hands as though they might provide him with an answer, "There was a young girl outside of Dr. Weir's cell…she was dead."

"You believe Elizabeth may have witnessed the death of this child?" Teyla inquired soberly.

John felt his heart sink; no one should ever have to witness the death of a child, least of all Elizabeth. He inhaled sharply as a horrible thought suddenly occurred to him. What if the Ontarish had used the girl as leverage to get Elizabeth to do something and she had refused? He knew that kind of guilt; he was living with it right now.

He heard the doctor coming before he saw her, the swishing of scrubs heralding her arrival long before she entered the room. Stark terror and anxiety seemed to grow in his mind with every footstep until, when it was nearly unbearable, Keller stepped into view.

John tried desperately to ignore the light traces of blood smeared on the doctor's shoe covers.

"How is she?" A worried Teyla took the words right out of his mouth.

"The surgery was successful; barring any complications, Dr. Weir should make a full recovery," Keller sounded tired but happy.

_Elizabeth's okay._

The full body and soul relief that had thus far eluded him abruptly exploded in his chest and spread to his extremities like a wildfire. He felt weak, like all of his energy had been transferred to her; and he couldn't think of a better way for his strength to be used.

"Can we see her?" Rodney too, looked like he was suddenly exhausted.

Keller, who had probably been expecting the question, expertly fielded it, "It'll probably be at least an hour before the anesthetic I gave her wears off. Depending on my assessment of her condition, once she wakes up Dr. Weir will be moved into this room later tonight. You can see her then."

"Ronon and I shall inform Major Lorne of the good news; he is currently briefing Stargate Command on our mission," Teyla stood and bowed briefly before leaving the infirmary, her Satedan companion in tow.

McKay wandered out of the room, muttering an explanation to John that involved sandwiches and a nap.

When everyone else had gone, Keller picked up his chart and began perusing it. "I think I'll move Elizabeth in next to you if that's all right, Colonel," she teased lightly.

John's internal reaction to the suggestion was the opposite of what the doctor would have expected. He panicked, the repressed guilt replacing his relief and gnawing at his insides.

He couldn't face her.

What would he say? _Sorry you were hurt, Elizabeth; oh, and by the way, that was all my doing._

He had to get out of the infirmary.

"Actually, I was hoping to be released," Keller's look prompted him to quickly add, "Just to my quarters; the mission really wore me out and I was hoping to get some real sleep in a real bed."

She looked suspicious, but after a few moments of deliberation, consented, "All right; you could definitely use some quality rest. But," she jabbed a finger at him, "if I hear of you doing anything more strenuous than walking to the cafeteria, you'll be back in the infirmary so fast it'll make your head spin."

John quickly agreed, then asked tentatively, "Is it all right…can I see Elizabeth before I go?" That should be safe; she was still asleep. He could check on her and then disappear before she even knew he was there.

Keller looked like she was about to deny his request as she had Rodney's earlier, but he anticipated her response and opened himself up, just a little, "Please?"

She nodded, some of the skepticism leaving her face, "But only if you're quick and quiet."

That wouldn't be a problem; he didn't want Elizabeth disturbed any more than the good doctor did.


	15. Redemption

**_A/N: To the few of you who are actually still reading this, thank you! Not that I blame those of you who aren't because of my inability to update. *Epic fail* Anyway, this is the last chapter, although if enough interest is generated I have an epilogue in mind. Again, thanks for reading!_**

* * *

It had been three days, fourteen hours and forty-one minutes since she'd woken up in the infirmary with a scratchy throat, a tube in her chest, needles in her arm and no clue how she'd gotten there. Dr. Keller had been there in an instant, explaining this and that; and Elizabeth learned the tube in her chest was there to keep her lung from collapsing, three of her ribs were broken, her right kidney bruised, and her left arm dislocated.

She didn't remember being rescued. It took another three hours for the memories to come flooding back.

It had been two days, ten hours and twelve minutes since her x-rays came back clean and her chest tube was removed. Keller presented her with the wonderful news that she would be staying in the infirmary for at least another week and a half. Teyla snuck her an electronic crossword puzzle and offered her a sympathetic shoulder if she ever needed a friend. It had taken every ounce of self control she had not to fall apart in front of the Athosian leader.

It had been one day, six hours and fifty-two minutes since Keller had pronounced her fit enough to consume regular food (or whatever passed for it in Atlantis). Rodney and a surprisingly upbeat Ronon had brought her spaghetti and jello from the cafeteria, making small talk while she attempted to eat the lukewarm pasta. She pushed away the half-formed thought that might have given her a craving for turkey sandwiches and even managed to contribute to the conversation.

It had been exactly nineteen hours since the swelling had gone down enough in her injured eye that she could open it all the way. She celebrated by crying into her pillow when the infirmary's night shift dimmed the lights and retreated to their office.

In all that time, John hadn't come to visit her once.

Closing her eyes against the harsh glare of the infirmary lights, Elizabeth tried not to let it get to her. She had a pretty good idea why Sheppard was avoiding her; and she could even understand his reasoning to a point. Still, it hurt in a way that he hadn't been responsible for in a long time.

She eyed her I.V. line with thinly veiled disgust; what she really needed was to get out of here. Then she could track him down and let him know exactly…

Someone cleared their throat and suddenly the object of her thoughts was standing there in front of her, looking like he'd been caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

"Is this a bad time?" His boyish good looks were marked by cautious amusement.

Elizabeth certainly wasn't going to answer that; she motioned toward the chair Lorne had pulled over to her bedside earlier in the day, "Have a seat."

He looked hesitant, his hands shoved down the pockets of his uniform, but he did as she suggested.

"So I…"

"I know you're…"

They broke off at the same time, him with an awkward laugh, and her with the troubling knowledge that their normal rhythm was off. Usually they were so in tune with each other, but so far the only thing they'd managed to do with any kind of synchronization was to cut each other off.

John tried again, "I'm sorry I haven't been in to see you, Elizabeth; I just…"

She knew.

"Can I ask you a question?" It sounded like he was going to inquire about something benign, like the weather, not something that would rip her heart out and splatter it across the wall.

Elizabeth weighed her options in the length of time it took her to inhale. She knew John wasn't really looking for her permission; whatever question he had on his mind, he was going to ask her anyway. But he had left her an opening, one she could use to her advantage.

"All right, but only one; and only if you'll answer one for me." She wondered if he'd catch the loophole in her acquiescence.

He narrowed his eyes, "I'll answer your question _if_ you answer mine."

Drat, he was quick on the uptake; either he'd been spending too much time with her or he'd taken a negotiation training course at some point in his career.

She sighed and nodded, not seeing any way around the inevitable. At least by setting some conditions she could pretend it had been on her terms.

"Did you really punch that guard in the nose?" John's tone held a touch of pride.

She breathed a little easier, "Yes." _And it felt good too,_ she added silently.

He leaned in closer, "Ronon said he found a girl outside your cell…"

She flinched, then tried to cover it up by adjusting her gown.

John caught it anyway, "Whatever happened on that planet; none of it was your fault Elizabeth," his voice was soft and filled with concern.

"Who are you in this situation, the pot or the kettle?" The small smile she offered was wry.

"Touché," His grin was easy, but his eyes told her she'd hit a nerve, "So who was she?"

"Who?" She could play dumb with the best of them, and Umi was still too painful a subject to talk about, the catalyst to a breakdown.

"Elizabeth," He expelled her name like a sigh.

"Ah ah ah," she waved her finger at him like a mother scolding a child, "You said one question. Now it's my turn."

He shook his head ruefully, "Remind me never to get in a diplomatic dispute with you."

"Duly noted." She waited half a beat, swallowed hard, and then went in for the kill, "Why do you feel responsible for what happened to me?"

There was a pause, a strained moment of silence that had her questioning the wisdom in her choice of words.

He blew out a breath and the tension dissipated, "The last time the guards tried to "encourage" me to use the chair, things…got ugly."

That she remembered very well, and it was something she wasn't likely to forget anytime soon.

"They gave their little speeches, gave the same old threats," John hesitated, and his mouth suddenly evolved into a thin, grim line. She didn't miss the way his eyes briefly scanned her from head to toe. "Then they decided to try something new. One of them—well, he threatened you specifically." He stopped again, his gaze fixed firmly on his hands, and this time the silence seemed to stretch on for an eternity.

Elizabeth thought about prompting him, but she could guess what had happened next. Knowing full well how fiercely devoted he was to his team, it shouldn't have surprised her; and yet somehow she still found herself in awe over John's willingness to defend her. She was torn between annoyance and deep appreciation; and somewhere in the back of her mind there was a question surfacing about why he had put the emphasis on the threat to her.

"…didn't take kindly to me throwing punches," Elizabeth suddenly tuned back in to John, who seemed oblivious to the fact she'd ever tuned out.

He blinked and she realized his attention had been focused on something she couldn't see, something beyond the physical room they were in. "Anyway, I must have blacked out, because the next thing I remember was waking up in our cell."

Elizabeth waited, then shook her head in confusion when it became evident he wasn't going to divulge more, "John, I'm not sure…"

He was incredulous, like he couldn't believe she hadn't put the pieces together herself, "Don't you get it? I'm responsible! If I hadn't lost my temper you would never have been put in the position you were in."

"Don't be ridiculous!" Her entire body protested as she instinctively lurched forward.

"Why did you do it? Why'd you stay behind?" He was angry, but whether he was more upset with her or himself, she couldn't tell.

"You're not expendable, John."

"Neither are you!"

She shook her head, "It's not the same; what you are to this city, your Ancient gene…"

"You're right," John cut her off, "It wouldn't be the same, but you've got it backward. You are worth more to this expedition than I ever could be."

"I just make decisions and try to keep Atlantis running smoothly; it's a hard job, yes, but there are any number of people who could do it just as well…if not better."

"You really don't see it, do you?" John was incredulous, "You ARE Atlantis. You and the city are virtually interchangeable in most people's minds."

Elizabeth wrapped her arms around herself, "I'm just a figurehead; that's all. It would be easy to find a replacement for me."

"No!" John spoke with such force that Elizabeth drew back unconsciously.

"You are the soul of this city," He continued in a tone that was softer, but no less passionate, "You care about everyone and go out of your way to make sure everyone feels appreciated. You work harder than anyone and you sacrifice so much of yourself for Atlantis. The people here would follow you anywhere, Elizabeth."

There was a fire in the depths of his eyes as he met hers, "and there is no way anyone could ever replace you."

A lone tear tracked its way down her cheek; and with the precursor to more brimming behind her lashes, Elizabeth reached for his hand, winding her cold fingers with John's warm ones.

She tried to say something, anything to thank him; but her throat had closed to the point where she couldn't speak. Luckily, nonverbal communication was their forte; and he seemed to understand her gratitude despite her inability to articulate it.

They just sat there in silence for a while, each drawing comfort from the other. The clattering of a tray and a nurse's muttered oath startled them both out of their reverie. Elizabeth jumped back, quickly pulling her hand out of John's grasp and hoping none of the infirmary staff had seen them; they were notorious gossipers. A second later, as the colonel graced her with his trademarked half-smile, she wondered why she cared what anyone thought.

She returned his smile, then yawned as a sudden wave of exhaustion swept over her.

"I'm sorry," The apology was punctuated by another yawn.

Standing up, John reclaimed her hand and gave it one last squeeze, "No, it's okay; I should go and let you get some rest. You look like you could use a little sleep."

Sinking back into her pillow, Elizabeth raised an eyebrow, "Way to flatter a girl, Sheppard. You're not looking all that fantastic yourself."

"Well it just so happens I'm off to bed myself," he mimicked her expression, smirking when her eyebrow shot up even further, "All right, you win. I'll see you tomorrow, Elizabeth."

"Wait," Her softly uttered plea stopped him in his tracks. Her gaze, clear and intense, caught and held his, "I just want you to know that I am dealing with this, John. I just…I can't talk about it yet."

He didn't say anything for a long time, and for once, she had no idea what he was thinking. Finally, he nodded once, leaning in to brush away the lone tear track on her cheek. "When you're ready to talk, or if the nightmares become too much…"

Knowing her voice would come out sounding shaky, she opted to simply nod in return, casting her eyes to the floor when the level of emotion in his eyes threatened to undo her.

He placed a finger under her chin and gently tilted her face until she was once again looking at him, "Find me."


End file.
